11 Weeks!!!

Depending on whose calendar we are going by... The doctor goes by my last menstrual period, I'm going by my body and the details... Doctor's calendar says 11 weeks is on Wednesday, mine says today, Monday, June 6, 2011...

I'm driving myself crazy- would LOVE to sneak in for an ultrasound... I feel exhausted and blah- not terrible, not good, just yucky... all I want to do is lay in bed... even watching TV does not sound like fun... food- yuck... nothing sounds good... I had been craving berries- McDonald's yogurt and granola parfait and Sam's Club 4 Berry Sundae... they don't sound good...

This morning I walked down the steps to let the washing machine repair man in, then back up stairs, and I was so winded and light headed that I had to sit down... I could hardly tell him what was wrong with the machine... it's not my asthma, I think it is just pregnancy...

The doctor said I could stop the progesterone in oil shots last Wednesday, but I am too scared... too scared I'll start to cramp and bleed...

Monday is the big Nuchal Translucency Scan and Genetics consult- this assessment will show me my risk of having a baby with Down Syndrome and 2 awful genetic diseases where most babies die soon after birth, if they live to be born... I just pray that my baby survives... I could handle Down Syndrome, the other two, I'm not so sure!!!

I have a feeling we are going to find out our baby has Down Syndrome... I have always been terrified of Down's and recently, after being around many people who where born with Down Syndrome or families who have a child with Down Syndrome, realize that it would be difficult, but certainly something I could handle... I'm wondering if this change of heart is the reason God has decided to bless us with a genetic child- after almost 15 years of marriage... because my heart has finally opened up to a baby with Down Syndrome...